Finding My Place: Facing the Pain to Forgive and Forget

Why is it so hard to forgive and forget? We all know we need to do it, but we hold on to the hurt like it’s a precious commodity. The pain becomes a part of our identity. We’re the victim, and everyone needs to know it. What they don’t know is that we’re also the prisoner. Emotional bondage is real, and unforgiveness will keep us there.

We will look for ways to drown out the memory, like alcohol, drugs, and other addictions. Anything that makes us feel good and takes away the pain. Our natural response is to run from anything that brings up the memories of that moment of shame. But what we need to do is face it. We need to forgive.

Why Forgive?

Forgiveness isn’t about the other person; it’s about you. It sets you free from the past and allows you to move on with your life. It gives you back power over your emotions instead of letting the hurt control you.

And it allows you to have a relationship with God.

Unforgiveness separates us from Him because He won’t force His way into our hearts. He wants us to come to Him willingly, but we can’t do that if we have unforgiveness in our hearts.

How Do I Forgive?

The first step is acknowledging that you need to forgive. You can’t move on until you make that decision. Once you’ve acknowledged the need to forgive, pray and ask God to help you do it. It’s not going to be easy, but with His help, you can do it.

The next step is facing the memory head-on. Remember every detail about what happened and how it made you feel. The anger, betrayal, fear, shame… feel it all again. Acknowledge those feelings and then release them. Let them go once and for all by forgiving the person who hurt you so deeply.

It won’t happen overnight, but each time those negative emotions come up, remind yourself that you forgave them, and they no longer have power over you!

Final Thoughts

You deserve peace in your life, peace that comes from having a clean heart free of unforgiveness towards others who have hurt you in your past. Don’t allow yourself to stay in emotional bondage any longer! Face the pain, forgive those who have wronged you, and move on with your life—a life full of hope for the future and a personal relationship with God Himself!

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